RULER tools can help you to support your child's social/emotional development at home! Here are some ideas about how you can use these tools.
The Family Charter
Just like the charters we use at school, a Family Charter is used to create shared ideas about how everyone wants to feel at home and what will be done to support those feelings. Please click here for some guidelines on how to create and use your own Family Charter.
The Mood Meter
- Post a copy of the Mood Meter at home (you can make your own, or download a copy here). Create a special marker for each member of the family to show where they are on the Mood Meter.
- Ask questions, such as
- "How are you feeling?"
- "Why do you feel the way you feel? How did the feeling get started?"
- "What is a good word to describe how you feel?"
- "How do you want to feel?"
- "What can you do to help yourself feel more like you want to feel?"
- Some emotions are uncomfortable, but no emotions are "bad." All emotions are important and okay!
- Try plotting different characters in books or movies on the Mood Meter, and look for evidence for why they feel the way they do.
- Keep a journal of your place on the Mood Meter and look for patterns. There is a handy Mood Meter app that can help you to track your mood
The Meta Moment
- Know the steps of the Meta Moment so that you can help your child (and yourself!) practice them when needed
- 1. Sense. You notice that something has changed in your body, mind, or behavior. (the Mood Meter can help with this!)
- 2. Pause. Make a decision to pause and take a few slow, deep breaths to calm your body and mind so you can think more effectively.
- 3. See your Best Self. Call to mind an image of your "best self"--the ideal self you want to be. This is you when you are acting in a way that fits with your values.
- 4. Strategize and Act. Choose a thought strategy (a way to think about the sitaution) or an action strategy (something specific to do).
- Post the steps in a visual spot so you can remember them when you need them most. Here is a poster you can use.
- If you know that a situation is likely to be a "trigger," you can plan for it by thinking through the steps of a Meta-Moment in advance
- Remember to practice the steps yourself!